Just don't repeat that to your mother

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
"Girl bees do all the work. But for humans, boys do all the work. Weird."

Sharing strategy

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
Upon learning that his 4-year-old brother, Grant, still had $20 of birthday money, Jackson said, "Do you want to buy a game? We could split it. You could buy one $10 game for me, and one $10 game for you!"

Teddy bears are known for that

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
Speaking of his teddy bear, Jackson said, "Sometimes Ted wakes up, asks me an easy math problem and then goes back to sleep."

Trust me, it's around here somewhere. Just give me the cash.

Dean, 6, Santa Monica, California

Dear Tooth Faree, I Lost my tooth. It olredee fell out. Love, Dean.

Going on 16

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
"OK, I get it: We're like, your slaves, and we have to do whatever you say, right?" Later, he said, "I'll help you weed, but I'll take several water breaks and several bathroom breaks."

Great survival skills

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
"I haven't drunk water in six days, and I'm still alive."

Waste not, oink not

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
"I only want one piece of sausage so as not waste so many pigs."

When a hug is in order

Grant, 4, Palm Coast, Florida
A few minutes after going to bed, Grant emerged from his room and, almost in tears, said to his mom and dad, "I miss you when I go to sleep."

Girls like it when you compliment their hair

Dean, 5, Santa Monica, California
"Mommy, let me tell you a joke: Your hair is made of meat."

What happens when we sleep

Grant, 4, Palm Coast, Florida
Speaking of his 6-year-old brother, Grant said, "Why does Jackson always get bigger than me when he sleeps a lot of times?"

Did you get all that?

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
In his prayer, Jackson said, "Bless that in August, it will get a little bit colder, and then the next month, bless that it will get a little bit warmer. The next month, don't change the weather."

How about a nice glass of juice?

Hayley, 8, Idaho Falls, Idaho
"I don't want to drink mysterious liquid that comes from a blister."

You used my own words against me... !

Nathan, 6, Idaho Falls
Dad: "I'm tired."
Nathan: "Hi, Tired. I'm Nathan." (smiling, satisfied with himself) "I played the joke back on you."

A good day starts with easy breathing

Hayley, 8, Idaho Falls, Idaho
When she was 3 and living in Kansas, Hayley was asked by her aunt if she was having a good day. "Yeah," Hayley said. "I don't have the hiccups."

You're officially old when you've wanted something for more than one year

Grant, 4, Palm Coast, Florida
Grant turned 4 today, July 14. After he opened a present, he cheered and said, "I've wanted this for years!"
Later, he said, "I've never been 4 in my whole life."

What I mean is, no.

Grant, 3, Palm Coast, Florida
Dad: Are you dressed yet?
Grant: Almost. But not too-most.

Slipped my mind...

Grant, 3, Palm Coast, Florida
Dad: What happened to this?!?
Grant: I forgot to not break it.

I think you mean FREEZE Tag

Grant, 3, Palm Coast, Florida
"Do you want to play Tease Tag? It's when you tag someone and then you say, 'You are a tee-tee!'"

We, robot

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
He wrote the following on a piece of paper and hung it on the refrigerator: "If are famly waorks tugethr, we will look like a giunt robot."

We're having WHAT for dinner?

Grant, 3, Palm Coast, Florida

It's called a toll booth

Grant, 3, Palm Coast, Florida
"Why do we go to a house and pay money sometimes?"

No parenting without representation!

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
After a lesson on how the colonies signed the Declaration of Independence to become the United States, Jackson found a practical way to celebrate the holiday.
He said, "Do you think we should rule ourselves on Independence Day? Like I can do whatever I want?"

All the world's a DVR

Jackson, 6, Palm Coast, Florida
"Dad, it's great that you paused your work and you don't have to resume until Tuesday."

First things first

Eliza, 2, Longmont, Colorado

Eliza asked why her mom was cooking.

Mom: Because your tummy needs some dinner.

Eliza: No! No! Not tummy. Mouf need food.